Daily Journal - 3/13/06 & 3/14/06
Jarrett tying his shoe while Mr. Nosey (aka Hobbes
the cat) watches and tries to bite the shoelace.
the cat) watches and tries to bite the shoelace.
I like this picture - boys playing cards with Grandpa,
while Uncle Bergy grills some steaks on the grill.
while Uncle Bergy grills some steaks on the grill.
Jarrett and Andrew in a chair at Uncle Ron's
Jarrett and Andrew on the floor...
tonight (3/14) - I cried all morning - I couldn't stop. It was one of those, I
wish I were dead moments that I have from time to time. Why can't I BE with
them? I'm their mom, they need me.
It went away for a few hours, but it's still here. It's a feeling I get that I can't
wish away. It's huge and it's just there. Always lurking, of course, in the
shadows. When I see the pictures of them, I can't believe they're dead. It's
just too unreal to fully comprehend sometimes... will I ever stop feeling so
lost and alone?
I did get Bob's headlight fixed. It only took 5 minutes. Then, I went and did
a little shopping at the mall. That cheered me up for a brief time. Now, I'm
getting ready to turn off the computer for the night. If you have a live child,
just give 'em a hug - say it's from me. You can do it, I can't. You are very
blessed...count your blessings! good night, djb
wish I were dead moments that I have from time to time. Why can't I BE with
them? I'm their mom, they need me.
It went away for a few hours, but it's still here. It's a feeling I get that I can't
wish away. It's huge and it's just there. Always lurking, of course, in the
shadows. When I see the pictures of them, I can't believe they're dead. It's
just too unreal to fully comprehend sometimes... will I ever stop feeling so
lost and alone?
I did get Bob's headlight fixed. It only took 5 minutes. Then, I went and did
a little shopping at the mall. That cheered me up for a brief time. Now, I'm
getting ready to turn off the computer for the night. If you have a live child,
just give 'em a hug - say it's from me. You can do it, I can't. You are very
blessed...count your blessings! good night, djb
Tuesday - March 14, 2006 - When Bob drove in the garage last night, I
noticed that the headlight on the passenger side was burned out. So, today
I'm going to take his car over to St. Charles and get that fixed. Of course, I'll
call them first. He gets to drive my car (the car that Andrew loved because it
had a CD player) to work today. He's so lucky!
It's kind of cold this morning. Yesterday morning, it was close to 60 - today
it's close to 22. brrrr. Don't worry, it'll change sooner or later. One of these
days, everyone will complain about the heat - except for me. Bring it on.
Did I tell you that I saw a robin on my way back from the store on Sunday?!
Yes, it's true. The first one of the year. I wrote it on the calendar as I always
do. I don't know why I do it. That's kind of funny or is it quirky?
Better get going. Talk to you later, djb
noticed that the headlight on the passenger side was burned out. So, today
I'm going to take his car over to St. Charles and get that fixed. Of course, I'll
call them first. He gets to drive my car (the car that Andrew loved because it
had a CD player) to work today. He's so lucky!
It's kind of cold this morning. Yesterday morning, it was close to 60 - today
it's close to 22. brrrr. Don't worry, it'll change sooner or later. One of these
days, everyone will complain about the heat - except for me. Bring it on.
Did I tell you that I saw a robin on my way back from the store on Sunday?!
Yes, it's true. The first one of the year. I wrote it on the calendar as I always
do. I don't know why I do it. That's kind of funny or is it quirky?
Better get going. Talk to you later, djb
later Monday (3/13) - When I saw these pictures, it reminded me of what someone said about how sweet the boys always looked in their
pictures together. Next to the picture on the home page, I made a reference to the below scenario. I'm sure Andrew and Jarrett were
sitting in the chair together, then Andrew challenged Jarrett to a duel or something like that. They never stopped arguing or wrestling or
rough-housing. They were like little lion cubs. Jarrett always taking his cue from Andrew. Let's ruuuummmble... see ya later, djb
pictures together. Next to the picture on the home page, I made a reference to the below scenario. I'm sure Andrew and Jarrett were
sitting in the chair together, then Andrew challenged Jarrett to a duel or something like that. They never stopped arguing or wrestling or
rough-housing. They were like little lion cubs. Jarrett always taking his cue from Andrew. Let's ruuuummmble... see ya later, djb
Monday, March 13, 2006 - We had one unbelievable thunderstorm last night. I was
tired, so I went to bed early. There was thunder and lots of lightning! I had to force my
eyes open to see - Yikes!! It was solid brightness outside. I'm guessing that Tommy
Skilling is at work right now adding up all the lightning strikes! Probably a million.
We thought the worst of the storm was over last night (earlier, we had some rain, thunder
and a little bit of lightning) but right when I was turning off the computer for the night (and
unplugging it, Thanks to Uncle Bergy), I saw an updated Tornado Watch or was it a
warning (see cartoon to the right)? I ALWAYS have to stop and think about it....
It's certainly a bit disconcerting when these types of storms hit during the night.
Although, most of the time, I can sleep right through them as long as I've gone to sleep
before they start. Of course, when the boys were alive, all they had to do was say,
"mom," and I'd be wide awake, "what?"
That reminds me of a story that Andrew wrote in first grade (with a picture). I'll have to
put it on here. It's pretty cute. Right now, I'm going upstairs to get some more coffee.
See ya later, djb
tired, so I went to bed early. There was thunder and lots of lightning! I had to force my
eyes open to see - Yikes!! It was solid brightness outside. I'm guessing that Tommy
Skilling is at work right now adding up all the lightning strikes! Probably a million.
We thought the worst of the storm was over last night (earlier, we had some rain, thunder
and a little bit of lightning) but right when I was turning off the computer for the night (and
unplugging it, Thanks to Uncle Bergy), I saw an updated Tornado Watch or was it a
warning (see cartoon to the right)? I ALWAYS have to stop and think about it....
It's certainly a bit disconcerting when these types of storms hit during the night.
Although, most of the time, I can sleep right through them as long as I've gone to sleep
before they start. Of course, when the boys were alive, all they had to do was say,
"mom," and I'd be wide awake, "what?"
That reminds me of a story that Andrew wrote in first grade (with a picture). I'll have to
put it on here. It's pretty cute. Right now, I'm going upstairs to get some more coffee.
See ya later, djb
Andrew (wrote his name at the top of the paper)
One day my borther was watching this show one night it was caled are
you afraird of the dark.
Then in the middle of the night my borther had a nigtmare in my bed
whean he woke up he started screaming.
Then my mom came rushing in because she thought Jarrett got hurt.
One day my borther was watching this show one night it was caled are
you afraird of the dark.
Then in the middle of the night my borther had a nigtmare in my bed
whean he woke up he started screaming.
Then my mom came rushing in because she thought Jarrett got hurt.
Not sure what the yellow thing is on the floor
near Andrew's side of the bed. I'm assuming he
had to write his name on the picture so at first
glance, it looks like Andrew's on the right side,
but after you read the story, you realize that's
Jarrett.
Fact check: They NEVER slept in the same
bed (except for that one time) because they had
bunk beds. So, obviously this is a piece of
fiction! He did get a yellow turtle sticker for a job
well done.
near Andrew's side of the bed. I'm assuming he
had to write his name on the picture so at first
glance, it looks like Andrew's on the right side,
but after you read the story, you realize that's
Jarrett.
Fact check: They NEVER slept in the same
bed (except for that one time) because they had
bunk beds. So, obviously this is a piece of
fiction! He did get a yellow turtle sticker for a job
well done.
